In the Eye of the Buyer

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder just as worth is in the eye of the buyer.

Have you ever been to a garage sale?  There is stuff laid out on tables, the ground, hanging up.  There are toys, clothes, electronics, furniture, knick knacks, gadgets, and so much more.  For the most part, the seller deems this stuff junk, stuff that just takes up space.  Get rid of the old and bring in the new.  As people come to look at all this “junk”, they see things as valuable, not as junk.  They will find something worth paying for.  Something they cannot live without.  And they will then ask the price.  If the buyer deems the price worthy, they will complete the sale.  But if the price is not comparable to their idea of worth, they will not pay the price.  It is not worth it.

My students are obsessed with Jordans.  They will spend $175 on a pair of shoes.  Scratch that.  Their parents will spend $175 on a pair of shoes. These shoes do not do their homework for them.  They do not help them jump many feet in the air.  The shoes don’t make them run faster.  But the students have determined the worth of the shoes and they have paid the price for them.  But I would never pay that much for a pair of shoes.  They are not worth it. 

If I could buy any car, without thought of price or where the money would come from, I would purchase an Audi S8 Eight Speed Tiptronic transmission with quattro all-wheel drive with a solar roof.  I’m drooling.  The cost of this car that I will drive only in my dreams?  A mere $111,945.  Chunk change, right?  As much as this is the car of my dreams, I would never pay this much for a car.  A house, maybe.  But not a car.  People obviously pay the price for this car.  Some people believe it to be a good deal.  I, personally, do not find the price to be worth it.  My heart breaks with the reality that I will never own this car, or any Audi, for that matter.  But it is not worth it.

There is a whole planet of people.  These people have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23).  These people have rejected God on many occasions.  People like David who had an affair and killed the woman’s husband by sending him to the front line of the battle (2 Samuel 11).  People like Saul (who later became Paul) who killed many Christians (Acts 9).  People like Zacchaeus who stole from the poor to make himself rich (Luke 19).  People like Moses who killed another man (Exodus 2).  People like Rahab who was a harlot (Joshua 2).  People like me.  A sinner.  What would you pay for even one of these people?  What would you be willing to give for the life of just one of them?  How much do you think they are worth?

But there is One who found all the above to be worthy.  He did not just pay the price for one of the above, but for ALL mankind.  And what He paid was not in the same kind of currency we use to deem something worthy.  He paid for us with His blood, with His life.  “But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” (Romans 5:8).  Christ died for us while we are still sinners.  He did not give His life for those that had already repented.  He didn’t give His life to just the perfect.  He died for all of us even though we are still sinning.  He died for us before He even knew us. 

It reads in Ephesians 2:4-9 “⁴ But God, who is rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, ⁵ even when we were dead in trespasses, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), ⁶ and raised us up together, and made us sit together in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, ⁷ that in the ages to come He might show the exceeding riches of His grace in His kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. ⁸ For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, ⁹ not of works, lest anyone should boast.” And in Titus 3:4-7 “⁴ But when the kindness and the love of God our Savior toward man appeared, ⁵ not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to His mercy He saved us, through the washing of regeneration and renewing of the Holy Spirit, ⁶ whom He poured out on us abundantly through Jesus Christ our Savior, ⁷ that having been justified by His grace we should become heirs according to the hope of eternal life.”

Romans 8:32 “³² He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things?”

When you begin to feel that you are not worthy, you begin to doubt your self-worth, remember that you were bought by someone who deemed you worthy.  You were bought by the blood of Jesus.  He gave His life for YOU.  He saw you and found you worthy.  God gave His one and only Son because He loved you so much. (John 3:16)  He considered you to be worth it.  He knew what He was giving up.  But He did not want to spend eternity without you.  He determined you are worth giving up His life so that you would have a chance at eternal life. 

Worth is found in the eye of the buyer and this Buyer deemed me worthy.

Our worth is determined not by worldly factors but By the Grace of God.

Learn with Desire

Standing in front of a classroom of adolescents, I find myself torn.  There is a group of young people that are eager to learn, to gain knowledge.  Then there is a small group of teenagers that are there because their parents kicked them out the door that morning and sent them to school.  And there is even a small handful of children that are there to act as the hurricane of the classroom.  They pull all the attention off the teacher, away from the learners, and put it all on themselves.  They are the ones that are cracking jokes, that aren’t even funny, by the way.  They are the ones yelling out unwarranted information.  They are the reason super glue was invented.  They don’t even want to be there.  They are not interested in getting an education.  It is on the very bottom of their list.  Scratch that.  It isn’t even on their list.  This small handful of children make the day torturous for the teacher and for those interested in obtaining a good education.

I want all of the students to want to be there.  I want each one to have an opportunity at success.  I want every one of them to desire the knowledge I have to share.  I know, I know, I am dreaming.  But it would be amazing to teach in a classroom where everyone who entered my door had a desire to be there and to learn.  I want to teach you because you want to learn.  I want there to be a mutual feeling about their education.  I want to aid in providing you with the best education and I want you to want it.

How amazing it would be if everyone came into my classroom of their own free will?  If each person that walked through my door, walked in by their own choosing.  Not because their parent’s made them come.  Not because they wanted to have all the attention.  But because they honestly wanted an education and they wanted to be there.  I know, dreaming again.  But seriously.  Not only would my job be a breeze, but there would be so much peace and happiness and learning.  Lots and lots of learning.  It would be like Heaven on earth.

That is what Heaven will be like.  When Jesus comes to take us home, only people that will be happy in Heaven will go.  There will not be people that were forced to go.  There will not be people that want to cause problems. Only people that could actually be happy will be there.  Heaven will be such a peaceful place. 

In Steps to Christ, Chapter 2, page 17 and 18, E. G. White writes “In his sinless state, man held joyful communion with Him "in whom are hid all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge." Colossians 2:3. But after his sin, he could no longer find joy in holiness, and he sought to hide from the presence of God. Such is still the condition of the unrenewed heart. It is not in harmony with God, and finds no joy in communion with Him. The sinner could not be happy in God's presence; he would shrink from the companionship of holy beings. Could he be permitted to enter heaven, it would have no joy for him. The spirit of unselfish love that reigns there --every heart responding to the heart of Infinite Love --would touch no answering chord in his soul. His thoughts, his interests, his motives, would be alien to those that actuate the sinless dwellers there. He would be a discordant note in the melody of heaven. Heaven would be to him a place of torture; he would long to be hidden from Him who is its light, and the center of its joy. It is no arbitrary decree on the part of God that excludes the wicked from heaven; they are shut out by their own unfitness for its companionship. The glory of God would be to them a consuming fire. They would welcome destruction, that they might be hidden from the face of Him who died to redeem them.”

In Revelation 22:14 and 17, ¹⁴John writes “Blessed are those who do His commandments, that they may have the right to the tree of life, and may enter through the gates into the city. ¹⁷And the Spirit and the bride say, “Come!” And let him who hears say, “Come!” And let him who thirsts come. Whoever desires, let him take the water of life freely."

I desire to be there in Heaven.  I desire to set foot in the New Jerusalem.  I yearn for the day I can walk through the pearly gates.  One day I will meet Jesus in the air. 

How about you?  Do you yearn for that day?  Do you desire to sit at Jesus feet?  Watch the lion and the lamb lay together?  Do you look forward to that day described by John in Revelation 21:4, “And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.”?  I do.

One day.  Only By God’s Amazing Grace.

Created in His Image

If you were asked what is your favorite thing to look at, would you answer yourself in the mirror?  Most people would consider this vain thinking.  But if that were asked of me, I would not even come close to that answer.  There are only two times I like looking in the mirror.  One, to make sure there is nothing on my face.  Two, to see Little Bit when she is looking in the mirror.  Otherwise, I am not a friend of the mirror.  I do not like what it reflects.  You can say I do not have much confidence in my appearance. 

But my daughter.  Little Bit is precious.  When she looks in the mirror, she will tell you that she is pretty.  Whenever I comb her hair, her response is always “pretty.” And she is.  We don’t ever want her thinking differently.   We will continue to instill in her confidence and worth.  Something her mother has not had much of.

Whenever we (Hubby and I) are out with Little Bit, our friends always comment on who she looks like.  There have been times that people will say she looks like me.  I always have to freeze my thoughts.  I can either accept what they say as truth and believe that if she is pretty and looks like me, I must be pretty as well.  Or I say, no, she doesn't because she is pretty.  But if I choose the latter, then in essence, I am saying she is not pretty because I think I am not pretty.  How can I say that about the most precious thing I have ever created? 

But I can go the opposite way as well.  In Genesis 1, God said “let us make man in Our image”.  As the creator of the universe, God is not going to make junk.  He is not going to make something He would not deem worthy or pretty.  So what am I saying about God when I look at myself and see someone unworthy?  What am I saying about God when I look in the mirror and make noises in disgust because of what I see?  If I am made in His image, then I must have some resemblance of Him.  Just like Little Bit has some of my characteristics, I must have some of God’s. 

In Ephesians 2:10, we are told “we are God’s workmanship, created in Jesus Christ for His good works”.  God made me.  Then how can I claim that I am not pretty.  How can I claim I am not good enough?  How can I claim I am unworthy?  I can’t.  God created me!  God made me the way I am for a purpose.  He has a work for me to do.  Just like He does for you, too! 

I can’t let the world’s standard for beauty affect my standard.  I can’t let what the world thinks is beautiful make me think I am not.  My husband told me about a month ago, “You are my standard for beauty.”  I can’t call my husband a liar.  He is not.  I know that I am real while what the world deems as beautiful is air brushed and photo shopped.  I am a child of God.  He created me.  Therefore, I am not ugly. 

I can change my opinion of myself.  I can work on my self-image.  I can see myself the way my husband sees me, the way I see my daughter, the way God sees me.  But it will take time and practice.  And it will only happen By God’s Amazing Grace.

Love Became Tangible

I like the tangible.  I have a need for the tangible.  I learn through seeing and touching.  I understand through experience.  You cannot just tell me a cataloptical is.  You need to show me what it is.  I need to be able to hold it, even if it is just a picture.  (And, no, I haven't a clue as to what a cataloptical is.)

And there was one thing growing up that I never understood.  I never had a chance to grasp it.  I wasn't able to see it or touch it.  It was a foreign object to me.  It was love.  But not just any love, unconditional love.  Agape love.  The kind of love God has for us.  Made no sense to me.  Didn't seem possible.  Teaching me about God's love was like teaching a 4th grader how to multiply polynomials.  Didn't make sense.  

I was always taught that "God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believes in Him will not perish, but have everlasting life." (John 3:16)  But I never understood that.  Why would He do that?  His only Son?  Really?  Doesn't make sense.  I had such a skewed view of love growing up, one with a completely different definition.  This didn't match my definition.  I know He did it, but I did not comprehend this love.

That was until I heard the heart beat.  Little Bit's heart beat.  This was the day I fell madly, deeply in love with her.  And I hadn't even met her yet.  I would do anything to protect her to make sure she made it into the world.  

Then the day she was born.  My love for her was greater than anything I had ever felt before.  I knew from that day forward, my  life would be different.  I would no longer put me first, but put her first.  I knew that I would do anything in my power to protect her.  I knew that she meant the world to me.

Through the next few years, watching her grow and develop, has changed me even more.  It has taught me even more.  There are times when she gets in trouble.  *Gasp*  I know, shocking.  A toddler, get in trouble?!  But in these times, I learn so much.  When she does things she should not do, guess what?  I still love her.  My love for her did not change just because she did something bad or wrong.  I still give her hugs.  I still tell her I love her.

These past 3  plus years, I have come to understand unconditional love.  Agape love.  I began to understand the love that God has for me.  For all of us.  A love that won't change.  He loved me before He even knew me.  When He was on the cross, I was on His mind.  He purposely made me.  He created me in His image.  And when I sin, God still loves me.  He might be disappointed, but His love for me does not change.  And this is true for you, too!  

It has taken me so long to learn this lesson.  To comprehend this love.  To be able to love.  And now that I have come this far, I will do everything I can to help Little Bit know it as well.  I will teach her about God's love.  I will show her, to the best of my ability, His love.  I don't want it to take her 20 something years to know how much God loves her.  

He loved us so much that "...though He was rich, yet for your sakes He became poor, that you, through His poverty, might become rich." 2 Corinthians 8:9  

"But He was wounded for our transgressions, He was bruised for our iniquities: The chastisement for our peace was upon Him, And by His stripes we are healed."  Isaiah 53:5

This love is possible only By God's Amazing Grace.

He will Give you Rest

Burdens are heavy.

Have you ever tried to lug a burden up the stairs or down the street?  Those things are full of dead weight.  It is like carrying a boulder around the corner.  You can't shift the weight of the burden to make it lighter.  
And it doesn't seem to matter how heavy my burden gets, I can't let go of it.  I can't put it down.

You would think I would have asked for help carrying my burden.  That would lighten the load.  But I see others carrying their burdens around, too.  Why would anyone want to carry any part of my burden?
And don't you dare try to trade me your burden for mine.  Nu-huh.  Not going to happen.  I don't want to learn how to carry your burden.  I am comfortable with mine now.  

You know what would be nice?  If someone just offered to take my burden.  Not trade it.  Just take it.  Not for just a minute or a month.  But forever.  If someone would offer to take my burden so that I never have to carry it around ever again.  That would be awesome!
But who in their right mind would offer to take my burden?  Who would be willing to relieve me of the pain and stress of carrying that thing around?  That is such a crazy idea.  Such sophomoric thinking.

But is it really?
There is Someone who has already offered to do this.  He has asked me many times to give my burden to Him.  He has asked if He could take care of the problem.  So why have I refused His offer?  Why didn't I just say "Here you go. It's all yours!"?  Am I really that stubborn?

In Matthew 11:28-30, Jesus says "Come unto me all ye that labor and are heavy laden, I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me, for I am meek and lowly of heart: and ye shall find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

Wow!  "all ye that labor and are heavy laden"?  He is calling me!  He wants to give me rest!
And He wants to do the same for you!  He is not just calling me, He is calling you as well!  He can take your burden.  He can give you rest. 

In Desire of Ages, page 330, Ellen G. White says, "There are many whose hearts are aching under a load of care because they seek to reach the world's standard. They have chosen its service, accepted its perplexities, adopted its customs. Thus their character is marred, and their life made a weariness. In order to gratify ambition and worldly desires, they wound the conscience, and bring upon themselves an additional burden of remorse. The continual worry is wearing out the life forces. Our Lord desires them to lay aside this yoke of bondage. He invites them to accept His yoke; He says, "My yoke is easy, and My burden is light." He bids them seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and His promise is that all things needful to them for this life shall be added. Worry is blind, and cannot discern the future; but Jesus sees the end from the beginning. In every difficulty He has His way prepared to bring relief. Our heavenly Father has a thousand ways to provide for us, of which we know nothing. Those who accept the one principle of making the service and honor of God supreme will find perplexities vanish, and a plain path before their feet."

Let us come to Jesus.  Let us give Him our burden.  Let us find rest, His rest, His peace.  Only then can we break free from the bondage of our burdens.  
We receive this rest, this peace, only By God's Amazing Grace.

A Time to Love

David tells us in Psalm 27:14 to "Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and He shall strengthen thine heart:  Wait, I say, on the Lord."

God's timing is perfect.  He has proved this to me so many times in my life.  I know this is true, but there are times in my life I act like a toddler who doesn't get exactly what she wants.  I may not throw myself on the ground, but I might throw a fit.  I want it, and I want it now.  There is one time that I saw God working in my  life, opening and closing doors, mending hearts, preparing lives.  Well, more than one time, but one specific event.

In Ecclesiastes 3:8, Solomon tells us "there is a time to love, and a time to hate...".  This could not be truer.

I was 15 years old.  I already had it set in my mind that I would never get married.  I would never have kids.  My main focus would be on my education.  That summer I joined a Summer Youth Group at a church in Mesquite.  I made lots of friends that summer including one guy named Gabriel.  By the end of the summer,I heard a rumor that he liked me.  But in my mind, it would be a waste of time, for the both of us, to pursue any kind of relationship, other than friendship.  I made it clear to him that I never intended on getting married.  

The following February he asked me to be his valentine.  This did not mean anything to me, so I said sure.  It was just a word.  And what would one day hurt?

Through the next few years, I dated a guy or two.  The relationships went no where.  I didn't want them to go anywhere.  I was not looking for love.  I was not looking for marriage.  I think it was more of the idea of having a boyfriend.  Nothing more.

Gabriel and I were still friends.  He knew about my so called boyfriends.  He met my so called boyfriends.  And yes, I knew he still liked me.  I wasn't doing it out of spite.  He was my friend.  I talked to him like a friend.  But I was not interested in him as any more than just a friend.  

A few more years went by.  He went off to academy then college.  We lost contact.  While he was gone, I became friends with his sister.  She was there for me like no one else has ever been.  I could tell her all my secrets.  She knew the depths of my heart.  When I felt like life was crashing down, I went and spent the weekend with her.  I still believe she saved my life that weekend.  That was an amazing weekend.  Not only did she help me heal, she put me on the path of my future.  She told me about her mom's surprise birthday party.  She wanted me to come.  I told her I would be there.

Over the next few weeks after returning home, I befriended Gabriel on MySpace (yes, it was THAT long ago.)  My feelings for him were still the same, though.  I only wanted to be friends.  I even informed him of this fact.

But God started working on my heart.  I began to want to have someone to spend my life with.  I wanted to get married.  I wanted to spend my life with a Godly man.  I went so far as to make a list of what I wanted in a man that I would marry.  I began to pray about that list and I even asked God to help me know who I was supposed to spend the rest of my life with.  I asked for a very specific sign.  

Then the weekend of the birthday party.  I got there early to help set up.  We put up streamers and put out chairs.  People started showing up slowly.  The guest of honor showed up, as did Gabriel.  I had not even thought he would be there.  Why not?  She is his mother, too.  The moment I saw him my heart skipped a beat.  He looked...different.  Grown up.  Mature.  I knew life would be different.

Gabriel and I started talking that night as if we never had stopped.  There was something different for sure, though, in how we talked to each other, what we talked about.  I can honestly say there was flirting happening on my end.  By the time we said our good-byes, we had each other's numbers and yahoo IM names.  

We talked EVERY day from that day forward. Usually through IM.  By the end of the week, I talked him into inviting me out to the college and spend the day with him.  We had our "date" planned out.  We were going to start at Starbucks, go watch a movie, then I would go home.  We made it to Starbucks, but not much further.  We talked past the start of the movie.  We ended up walking around the campus for the rest of the time.  Seven hours after my arrival, I went home.  

The next weekend, he came home.  We went to church together, spent the afternoon together, then went out on a "date" that night.  We actually made it to the places we planned this time.  Our night was cut short due to a fight at the bowling alley.  So we drove back to his parent's house.  Again, we talked.  By this time, I am sure he knew my whole history.  I actually told myself that I would tell him everything so that if he ever decided to leave me, he would leave me now, not later.  

After talking for a while, I looked at him and told him, "you know, if you ask me to be your girlfriend, I won't tell you no."  So he asked, and I said "yes".  And it was that night that I knew he was the man God had set aside just for me.  He was the man God created to spend the rest of my life with.  God had answered my prayer of completing my list and fulfilling the sign I asked for.

He came again the next weekend.  By the end of the weekend, I pulled him aside and said, "you know, if you ask me to marry you, I won't say no."  (when a girl knows, she knows)  We were unofficially engaged that weekend.  We wanted to do it right.  So he asked my dad for his blessing.  Of course my dad said yes.  By the end of the month, he got down on one knee and officially asked me to be his wife.  

We are still together, happily married, five and a half years later.  God has blessed our lives and our marriage.  I praise God for how He worked in our lives.  We were talking about it the other night.  I asked Gabriel what he thought would have happened if we would have started dating sooner, when I knew he like me.  I wonder how our lives would have been different.  What he said next is so true.  He said "I don't think we would have been ready for it."  Looking back, I know I would not have been ready for that kind of relationship.  God had to prepare my heart for that kind of love, a love I never knew had existed.  If we would have worked in our time, I do not believe we would be happily married, or even married.  I don't know.  I just know God's timing is perfect.  And God was able to work in our lives, preparing each of us for the life we have today.  If it were not for my past relationships, I would not know how good I have it.  I would not know what true love is.  I am happily married today, only By God's Amazing Grace.

Wet Panties and a Clean Heart

Little Bit has learned a new trick.  She now goes pee pee...in the potty!  My husband and I started teaching her this new trick about a month ago.  And she caught on pretty quickly.  It took her about a week to recognize when she needed to go.  She began by asking to go potty while pee would trickle down her legs.  That caused quite a few messes.  And tons of laundry.  Then she started to get a little better at it.  She would run to the bathroom and actually make it in time.  She no longer is an amateur.  Not quite a professional.  Maybe an apprentice.  But she will get there in no time!

Today, Little Bit was playing with her cousin.  She was preoccupied having tons of toddler fun.  Until she had to go potty.  "Want go pee pee," she exclaimed while running down the hallway.  We rush into the bathroom and I get her on the potty.  And that is when I noticed.  She was so preoccupied, having so much fun, that she didn't realize in time that she had to go potty.  She did not make it to the toilet.  Dirty panties off, clean ones on the way. 

Did I get mad?  No.  Was I upset?  Not at all.  She is a toddler.  I understand.  Accidents happen.  While I clean her up, I explain to her that she needs to go pee pee in the potty and not her panties.  I realize she is still learning and I need to be patient with her.  It is not like she pee'd in her pants just because she wanted to put on a new outfit.  It was just an accident.  My love for her did not change.  I didn't yell at her and tell her she was such a bad child cause she didn't go pee pee in the potty.  I just showed her love.

And it is amazing.  I am much older than Little Bit and I have accidents, too.  There are times that I am not able to hold my tongue and I say things that are not nice; things that might hurt someone's feelings.  There are times that I get so preoccupied that I am not able to control my thoughts and actions.  There are times that I need to put a new outfit on, whether it be a smile or a new attitude.  And every time I slip up, have an accident, make a mistake, God patiently and lovingly cleans me up. He helps me to change my attitude.  He changes my perspective.  He changes my heart.  

I cannot change on my own.  I need to change from the inside out.  It is not a feasible task for me to handle.  The only way I can change, be a better person, is By God's Amazing Grace!

Perceived Reality

There is nothing like raising a toddler.  She loves to explore all the crevices in our home.  She finds herself in the closets often because there are so many new and neat things she has yet to discover.  No matter how much we have cleaned, she finds all the dropped food in the nooks and crannies of the carpet.  And she will determine for herself if it is worth eating.  Never mind our "No!  Don't eat that!" or "That's icky!"  She has to find out for herself.  

And don't even get me started on bedtime.
Too late.
Sigh

Tonight was like any normal night.  After reading a couple stories and sharing cuddles galore, we walked the green mile.  Holding hands, we walked toward the bedroom.  She looked up at me with those innocent eyes of hers, "Night, Night?".  Asking as if this was the end.  There would be no tomorrow.  "Yes, Baby, night night time."  She climbed up into bed with a heavy sigh.  I sing to her some of my favorite hymns.  In between each one, she had to ask for more hoping to extend the time before she had to enter dream land.  "I want song."  Then we prayed.  Her soft, sweet voice finished the prayer with a sad "Amen".  I give her kisses and hugs and walk out of the room.  Just because her night is over doesn't mean mine is.  
Oh, but her night is far from over.
The moment my foot steps can no longer be heard by her little ears, her little foot steps begin.  I then must turn around, give her squeezes, and send her right back to bed.  "Pray?"  So we talk to Jesus again, asking Him to help her stay in bed.  Then the sucking starts.  Her thumb and forefinger are in her mouth, comforting her, sending her into lala land.  I begin to leave the room.  And she follows right behind.  My little shadow.
Back to bed we go.  Another song, another prayer, shared kisses, and a tight hug.  Then my footsteps followed by hers.  
After about an hour of me and my shadow routine, she finally is completely out.  No little foot steps behind mine.  No more asking for songs.  No more up and downs.  Just peace and quiet.  
I am not sure why she fights her bed time most nights.  Maybe she feels she is going to miss the most exciting, riveting moments of the day by going to bed.  Trust me, nothing exciting or riveting here.  Just papers to grade and a kitchen to clean.  She doesn't know that, though.  She only knows that I am not going to bed with her.  I am staying up.  According to her, I never sleep.  So why does she have to?  
But that is not fact.  That is not reality.  It is only what is imagined.  What is perceived. 

I, too, am like this at times.  Not that I fight bedtime.  But I fight God.  I see things one way, but He knows the reality.  He knows the facts.  He walks with me and shields me from that reality.  He knows I cannot handle the facts.  But He's got it handled.  When I look at it, I only see a small picture.  But when God looks at it, He sees it all.  The past, present, and future.  He knows what is best for me. I know my wants, He knows my needs.  I think I can carry the world on my shoulders, but He knows how much I can handle.   He's got this.  I need to realize He is taking care of me, that He knows what is best for me.  I need to let go and let God.  But I can only do this By God's Amazing Grace.

Greetings and Salutations

Welcome to By God's Amazing Grace!  Ephesians 2:8 says "For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God".  And God's grace is truly amazing.  
I am on a journey.  Heaven bound.  Although I know the destination, I do not know the stops in between.  Right now the journey is more like a roller coaster ride.  Sometimes I cannot see what is ahead of me. Sometimes I feel like I am going in loops.  There are times I feel as if I am going backwards.  And other times I am going so fast, I cannot see where I am going.  
Life is like that, though.  I am sure you all can agree.  You buckle up cause you know it will be a bumpy ride.  You know there will be twists and turns.  You know there will be uncertain moments.  But you stick it out and keep going on this journey of life.  You stay brave.  You don't give up.  You don't lose hope. Why?
I don't know your reason.  But I do know mine.  I have a daughter.  She is an amazing young lady.  She just turned three recently.  She is my reason to stay buckled up.  She is my reason to finish this journey.  
And I have a wonderful husband.  We have been married for 5 and half years.  If it weren't for him, this ride would be a little boring.  He makes the ride worth it.
And I have my faith in God.  Without Him, this ride would have ended years ago.  This journey would be over by now.  Without Him, there is no hope.  He is my strength.  It is only By God's Amazing Grace.