Wet Feet

I did something that shocked quite a few people recently.  I got into the lake.  The water came up to mid calf.  It was chilly but not terrible.  And a couple days before that, I got my feet wet...in the lake.

Why was this such a shock?  Because of my immense fear of the water.  Not just any water.  Water that does not come out of the faucet or that is in a swimming pool.  So oceans, lakes, rivers, ponds, streams.  Nope, won't touch them with a ten foot pole.

Until the other day.  What made the difference?  Little Bit.  She made all the difference.  I don't want her to be afraid of the water.  Therefore, I don't want her to see my fear.  A fear that is sometimes crippling.  I want her to feel secure.  So I went into the water with her.  And she had a blast. 

I survived it.  So, I guess I could say that it was somewhat fun. 

Was I scared?  For most of the time.  But when I took my focus off of my fear and put it onto Little Bit to ensure she had a good time, I began to relax.  A tad.  I eventually had to switch off with The Hubs.  I gave the excuse I wanted to take pictures.  Which, by the way, is very true.  But as I was taking pictures, my feet were still in the water.  (Go ME!!)

I know why I am afraid of water, but that situation is so far removed that it should not be an excuse any more.   I should not be afraid of water.  For one, God created the water.  I am afraid of something He spoke into existence.  And two, I have a Protector. 

Does this mean I can just get in the water without even thinking about it?  Haha.  No.  Not yet, at least.  Baby steps.

Do you remember the story of Peter?  One of my blogs is about him.  "Where is Your Focus".  I wonder if Peter felt like I do when he asked Jesus to allow him to come on the water.  Maybe he was trying to act all tough by getting out on the water.  Maybe, maybe not.  But as long as he kept his eyes on Jesus, he wasn't afraid.  When he took them off of Jesus, he became afraid and started to sink.  Once I took my focus off of my fear and put it onto my daughter, I began to relax.  It is all about the focus.  Am I going to focus on my fear and be paralyzed?  Or am I going to focus on something else, preferably God, and enjoy myself?  I want to do the latter.  I need to do the latter.  It is a work in progress.

This reminds me of the verse in 2 Timothy 1:7 where we are told that God does not give us the spirit of fear but of love, power, and self-control.  God loves me enough to give me the power to face my fears and control my fears so that I am not afraid.  If He did not give me the fear, then I should not be afraid.

But it is so hard.  It is much easier being afraid.  But I miss out on life due to my fears.  Especially now that I live five minutes from the lake.

I know that I can overcome this fear.  I know that I can be strong for Little Bit.  I know that I can be strong for me.  And I know I can put my focus on Him so that I am not afraid. But this is only possible By God's Amazing Grace.